A Matter of Principle
by Leareth

First published January 2008

He came after the rain began, a solid shadow that appeared on Subaru's balcony like a large raven finding shelter for the night. It was a common occurrence by now, enough that Subaru was moving to welcome him even before Seishirou could knock on the glass. The wind attacked Subaru as soon as the door slid aside by throwing cold raindrops into his face, but it wasn't enough to hide the cloying, slightly metallic scent that rose from Seishirou's clothes like stray threads of silk. Subaru stopped short as he recognised the smell, and his fingers tightened on the door handle he had not yet let go of. "Why," he demanded bluntly.

Seishirou didn't move; he was little more than a blurred silhouette in the night's rain. "Why what, Subaru-kun?"

"Why did you come here."

It was hard to tell, but Subaru imagined there was a slight smile on the other's face. "I thought we were past you asking that question."

"You know what I mean." The black long-sleeved t-shirt he was wearing was getting spotted with rain, making Subaru shiver though he refused to yield the space he took up in the doorway. "Why come here after you've—" He broke off.

There was a roll of thunder somewhere overhead. "After I've been on a job?" finished Seishirou. "I would have gone home, but it's rather far from where I was and the weather is obviously unpleasant. This was closer."

"I don't care. You're not coming in here with blood on your hands."

"Oh?" The tone of Seishirou's voice was that which always accompanied a questioning lift of the eyes. "Interesting. You've always allowed me to enter your home before despite knowing I am the Sakurazukamori, even invited me in, so whether I actually have blood on my hands or not should be beside the point. Or are you the type of person who blinds himself to what he doesn't want to know as long as there is no material evidence before him?"

Subaru flinched as the barb hit home and deep. "You're being inconsiderate," he retorted, but it was only reflex; there was no way Subaru would let Seishirou remain out in such bad weather, and they both knew it. Subaru moved aside. Immediately Seishirou stepped through, water dripping from the hem of his coat to gather into little pools on the floor. Subaru ignored the mess as he shut the door and moved away where finally, in the light spilling from the kitchen, he could properly see Seishirou.

Subaru's breath caught. Seishirou had taken off his shoes and was removing the long black coat he always wore when outside. Water dripped over his face, trailing down his cheek catching the light. His hair was soaked and licked his skin likes strokes of fresh calligraphy Subaru wanted to smear with his fingers. Below that Seishirou's eyes were focused on the act of folding his coat; one honey-gold with the intensity of a glowing coal, the other cold white. Subaru wanted them to look at him, but then he saw Seishirou's hands, methodical in their movements, and the right one sheathed in dark blood. Subaru turned away. "You could have at least cleaned that off before coming here," he said bitterly.

"My apologies. I shall remember for next time." There was a wet slapping sound and Subaru looked back to find that Seishirou had taken off his suit-jacket, which was now draped along with the coat over his arm. The kill must have been just minutes ago, thought Subaru, feeling sick as he realised that the right sleeve of Seishirou's shirt was soaked in blood up past the elbow, and there was more across his chest bringing back painful memories. Then again …

"May I use the bathroom?" asked Seishirou, interrupting his thoughts.

Subaru nodded. He averted his eyes as Seishirou walked past heading down the hall. Then again, despite the blood, it was impossible to deny the physicality of the man, blatant beneath the rain-drenched shirt that clung to him like a second skin. It didn't help that water turned white cotton translucent … Subaru nervously wet his lips. Whilst he had always been drawn to Seishirou mentally and emotionally, physical attraction was something he had only begun to explore properly in recent weeks and he had little idea how it should be handled. He was certain, however, that there was something very wrong about wanting Seishirou when the man had just finished a kill, and it disgusted Subaru that he could still find the man so compelling in such a state. He should have just told Seishirou to go home.

Wind blew into the windows making them rattle. It roused Subaru out of his stupor and he shivered, mechanically moving to fetch a towel to clean up the water on the floor. It gave him something to do, something to focus on other than the knot of tension that was growing in his gut. On hands and knees he got down, wiping up the rain that Seishirou had brought in with wide measured strokes as if he could wipe his emotions away. He imagined that the scent of blood lingered in the water which only prompted him think of Seishirou more, and the thought made him feel unclean. Almost as if in some perverse way he was taking pleasure from the death Seishirou had just brought …

Subaru's fingers tangled in the soggy towel. He couldn't help it; unbidden he wondered about the person whose blood was on the Sakurazukamori's hands tonight, man or woman, adult or child, what family and loved ones were crying over him or her. Seishirou had been right – if there wasn't any proof before him Subaru could close his eyes to all the lives his lover had destroyed, including the life of his own sister, and he had done that every time that Seishirou had come over. A harsh truth for sure, and one he had been desperately trying to avoid … with sudden determination Subaru made his decision. As soon as Seishirou was finished he would tell the man to leave. It would be more than simply easing his mind, Subaru told himself as he got up and put the towel away, it was also a matter of principle, to show Seishirou that there were limits to what Subaru could be expected to tolerate. He headed towards the bathroom.

The sound of falling rain murmured through the walls like a whispering crowd, but threaded through it was something more focused: the sound of water flowing from a tap. Warm yellow light angled out into the dim hall from the half-open bathroom door, and Subaru paused at its edge for a moment to steel himself for confrontation and look inside. He stopped. Seishirou, shirtless and with his back to Subaru, was apparently washing something in the sink dressed only in his mostly dry black pants. Dried blood still streaked much of his right arm and chest; a newer trail of it, however, had worked its way down to his wrist to drip onto the counter. It was fresh blood, bright beneath the yellow bathroom light and still very wet, scenting the air with a hint of iron. Suddenly it struck Subaru that maybe the bloodstains weren't all from the victim, a realisation which altered his perception of the world and overrode all other concerns he had. Without thinking he pushed the door open and stepped inside. "What happened?" he asked worriedly.

Seishirou briefly glanced up into the mirror to meet Subaru's gaze, but didn't stop his washing or turn around. Subaru knew better than to think that he had caught Seishirou by surprise – if he had he would probably be shoved up against the wall by now with Seishirou's hand around his throat – but apparently Seishirou was used enough to Subaru's presence to understand that Subaru wasn't going to attack him while his back was turned. "Do you really want to know?"

"You're hurt." Anxious, Subaru went to Seishirou's side, tiles cold beneath his bare feet. Now that he was closer he could see that what Seishirou was washing in the sink was his shirt. The blood had tinged the water pink, and there were darker splotches still embedded in the shirt like patches of rust. Subaru's attention, however, was fixed on Seishirou's injury, a deep stab-wound in the flesh of his upper right arm that was maybe an half an inch long. Hesitantly Subaru reached out to touch the skin around it as if to confirm its existence – this was Seishirou, the Sakurazukamori, and such a thing wasn't supposed to be there. "How did that happen – never mind, I'll get some bandages." Pulling away Subaru moved to bend down to open the cupboard below the bathroom sink where he kept a simple medicine kit, only to be stopped short as Seishirou grabbed his wrist.

Subaru glanced up, startled. Seishirou was watching him with smouldering intensity. "You didn't answer my question," the man said softly, mismatched eyes never moving from Subaru's. "Do you want to know what happened?"

Subaru swallowed. No, he did not want to know, but he couldn't get his tongue to say it. Seishirou's hand was cold and wet, mostly cleansed of the blood that had coated it save for what was caught under his fingernails, and held Subaru's right hand uncomfortably close to Seishirou's waist. At this close range it was impossible for Subaru to continue pretending that he didn't see Seishirou's body or that he was unaffected … the image of Seishirou pushing him to the floor suddenly appeared in his mind and he bit his lip, trying to still the tiny fluttering sensations in his chest. He wondered if Seishirou could see the conflict in his face. Most likely yes; Seishirou leaned in closer, smile widening as Subaru didn't make any answer. "Well then," he said, pressing Subaru's palm to his chest. "Why don't I show you."

Before Subaru could protest Seishirou swung him around so that he was trapped against the sink. As an afterthought Seishirou turned off the tap, leaving only the muted sound of rain and wind to fill the silent spaces. "You're the victim," said Seishirou with a smirk, "and I'm me, of course. It's late at night and you're hurrying to the train station when I come to find you. You don't know who I am, but the moment you see me you know that you're about to die."

He couldn't help it; immediately Subaru's imagination jumped to throw at him the image of some harried office-worker or salary-man wanting nothing more than to go home. Being already the prey of the Sakurazukamori it was easy for Subaru to picture the scene in his head, how the victim would freeze at the appearance of the Sakurazukamori, the smile the assassin would be wearing, the terror that would spread over the victim's face. His hand clenched; beneath his fingers Seishirou's skin was cold, still damp with the rain that had soaked through his clothes. "To your credit, the moment you realise what's going on you don't panic or immediately try to run," continued Seishirou, and the character in Subaru's head shifted from some bespectacled clerk to an older, intelligent authority figure. "What I don't know is that you have a concealed knife on your person, one that you can use with some degree of skill. The moment I get in close—" here Seishirou moved Subaru's hand so as to make Subaru mime reaching for something at his left hip that he whipped out and slashed quickly through the space between them, "—you attack me with it and force me back. Does it make sense?"

Subaru nodded numbly, right hand held in mid-air out to his side as if he really had just drawn a knife and sliced it through the air in front of him. He stared at Seishirou's chest and the bloodstains there as in his mind the authority figure became an athletic man crouched in a defensive pose with focused eyes and knife at the ready. Seishirou stepped away from him a little, still not letting go of Subaru's wrist. "I've backed off. I underestimated you – you're one of the rare few who I haven't killed immediately. An interesting situation, but not one for worry. Now that you've lost the element of surprise you don't stand a chance." Seishirou's lips curved into an unpleasant smile. "What's more, you know it."

Subaru tried to pull his wrist out of Seishirou's grip. "Stop, I don't want to hear this—"

He gasped as Seishirou suddenly spun him again so that he was facing the mirror with the edge of the sink digging painfully into his stomach. "You've turned to run," the Sakurazukamori whispered into his ear, fingers squeezing Subaru's wrist as he held Subaru's hand against the sink-edge. Subaru froze as Seishirou pressed up against him, feeling the water that still clung to the man's body soak into the back of his shirt. "You run fast, and I let you get ahead of me. You probably think that I can be outrun." An amused chuckle; Subaru felt Seishirou's chest shiver against his back, the man's body holding him in place. "Unfortunately it's beginning to rain, which means I want to finish quickly. So I only let you run for a little while. Then I give chase, but I don't catch up from behind. Instead, I attack from the front."

Terror and desperation as hopes of escape disappeared … Subaru could see the roles of Seishirou's story being played out before him in the mirror, the anticipatory gleam in Seishirou's good eye of a hunting predator coming for the kill, the mute fear in his own face as the prey … "Enough," whispered Subaru, trying to ignore the way his pulse was racing as if his veins were the strings of some instrument Seishirou had struck. "Enough, don't tell me anymore—"

He broke off as Seishirou spun him again so that they were facing each other. "The rain has started to fall," Seishirou continued, and he spoke quietly so that Subaru could hear the rain falling outside. "It's heavy, which means that by the time you see me I've already closed in." Languidly Seishirou dropped Subaru's wrist and trailed damp fingers up Subaru's chest, the contact light and painfully tangible through his shirt like falling snow. Subaru inhaled sharply – oh, it was wrong, so wrong, how could he listen to this and still enjoy Seishirou's touch – and Seishirou's smile widened as he brought his hand to rest over Subaru's heart. The man was obviously playing with him, Subaru realised angrily, wanting to stab out the laughter that was dancing in those mismatched eyes— "Your ribs splinter easily. I can feel your lungs constrict around my hand, and the warmth of your flesh—"

"Shut up," Subaru gritted out.

"—your blood soaks into my clothes, more than the rain can wash away—"

"Shut up—"

"—but you had good reflexes, bringing your weapon up to stab me in the arm just as I kill you, however it's too little too late, and you're already dead—"

"I said shut up!"

Subaru shoved Seishirou away. The assassin took two or three steps backwards, leaving Subaru leaning against the sink breathing heavily with the smell of blood filling his nose and imagining the last images the dying victim would have seen, the hand sunk deep into his body, the smile on Seishirou's face through the rain, the wet fingers that slipped from the knife's handle leaving the blade embedded in Seishirou's arm. His heart was pounding, Subaru was aghast to realise, and worse than that was the ache in his groin— "Get out," he hissed. "Get out of my apartment."

"You don't mean that." Seishirou raised an eyebrow. "Besides, I'm wounded, soaked to the skin and bloodstained – surely you wouldn't send me out into the night storm in this state?"

"Then clean yourself up first," retorted Subaru viciously.

"Only if you help me."

Subaru glared. "Fine." Glowering he bent down to fetch the medicine kit from beneath the sink. "I've run out of disinfectant so that's too bad for you, but as soon as we're done you're leaving—" He turned around and broke off.

Seishirou stepped deliberately out of his pants and pushed them to one side with his foot. He never took his eyes off Subaru as he did this, and it was all Subaru could do to keep his grip on the medicine kit. "What are you doing?" he demanded.

There was a dark smile playing about Seishirou's lips. "You said that you'd help me get cleaned up."

Subaru stared without comprehension, first at the expression on Seishirou's face, then the set of his shoulders, the muscles of his chest, further down … his gut clenched into a tense knot. Intimately acquainted with Seishirou's body as he was he had never looked upon the man so openly, not in darkness, certainly not in light. The impulse to touch returned, strong as the pull of an ocean tide as he imagined all that Seishirou's body promised him – and just like that, understanding dawned. Subaru's hands clenched down on the medicine kit. "You're being unfair," he whispered.

"And you're being hypocritical. But I'll tell you what." Seishirou's smile grew wider, more unpleasant. "Get through this with what's left of your dignity intact and I'll leave without protest."

"And if I don't?"

The expression that came over Seishirou's face then made Subaru shiver. "Well," said the man softly, voice heavy with underlying meaning. "I wouldn't be leaving then, would I."

Subaru didn't answer immediately. He knew full well what game Seishirou was getting at, and had a bad feeling about his chances. Briefly he wondered if he could simply put his foot down and insist on Seishirou leaving now, but one look at Seishirou told him that not only was that a bad idea, it was a hopeless idea that would achieve nothing other than pain and humiliation. At least with Seishirou's proposal he had something resembling a chance instead of no chance at all. He swallowed thickly. "What do you want me to do?"

Seishirou chuckled darkly before slowly stepping across the small expanse of tiled floor to Subaru, moving with the easy confidence of one who is perfectly comfortable in his own skin. It was completely unfair, thought Subaru distantly as Seishirou stopped bare centimetres from him; for most people nudity made them appear vulnerable but with Seishirou it seemed simply to express a different sort of strength and power. Certainly he still looked dangerous. "What do I want you to do?" repeated Seishirou, the words low and amused. He bent down to put his lips right by Subaru's ear. "I want you to get wet."

Before Subaru could say anything Seishirou took hold of his arm and pushed him roughly towards the shower. Subaru struggled more out of habit than anything, dropping the medicine kit on the floor where it burst open throwing its contents everywhere as he barely picked up his feet in time not to trip over the ledge— "Seishirou-san!"

Seishirou looked infuriatingly smug. "Be careful," he said, "you might slip." Subaru tried to glare but was too busy trying to find his balance as he was manhandled into the shower stall like an offender into a police cell. Quickly Seishirou stepped in behind him, sliding the door shut before turning around. Subaru turned red; his shower didn't have much floor-space, which meant that the two of them were pressed uncomfortably close against each other. He tried to tell himself that it wasn't important – after all, Seishirou had been a welcome invader of his bed for several weeks now – but then Seishirou reached around him to turn on the water and suddenly convincing himself it's not important became exponentially harder.

Cold water on his neck. Subaru shivered, partly from the temperature as his black clothes became plastered to his skin, partly from the way Seishirou pressed against him as he adjusted the hot water faucet. Subaru had to tilt his head back a bit to look. Seishirou's dark hair was dripping wet just like when Subaru had opened the door for Seishirou to come in, only this time Seishirou wasn't wearing anything at all … Subaru turned away, trying to calm his breathing. Much as he desired Seishirou right now, to give in to him at this moment would be to condone what he had done, and for that reason alone Subaru was determined to resist. The more sensible part of Subaru's brain dryly pointed out that if he was so determined to resist he should get out the shower, however Subaru didn't want to give Seishirou the satisfaction of running away – or so he told himself. He cleared his throat. "Wouldn't it be better if I dressed that wound first?"

"It's not as bad as it looks," was the reply. The air was beginning to fill with steam now, a damp mist of swirling white that blurred all lines. Subaru glanced out of the corner of his eye and was abruptly caught by the sensual pleasure that spread over Seishirou's face as the rapidly warming water ran over his skin. He must have been cold, Subaru realised distantly, enraptured by the sight, but then Seishirou opened his eyes and the fleeting tenderness was gone. "Aren't you going to get the soap?"

"Ah …" Subaru turned and ducked down out of the water's spray, looking for the object in question. Somehow it had made its way onto the floor so he bent down to retrieve it – and abruptly paused. Around their feet swam thin, graceful red lines that slowly stretched out to slip down the shower's drainage hole.

Strong fingers grasped his arm. They pulled him roughly upwards, through the shower's spray and onto his feet. Gasping, Subaru shook water out of his soaked hair to find Seishirou's unreadable face inches from his own. Deliberately Seishirou pressed Subaru's hand to his chest and the bloodstains there. His mismatched eyes never blinked.

"Clean it off."

Subaru swallowed nervously, but it was too late to try and get out of this now. "Uh, okay," he said, pushing his soaked hair back trying to keep it out of his face. Still he could feel rivulets dripping down into his eyes; there was no way he would be able to see what he was doing. He took hold of Seishirou's arm and gently tugged. "Come over here."

Without waiting for an answer Subaru stepped around Seishirou, pushing him back into the shower's spray. To his surprise Seishirou made no comment about being handled so, probably because there was little point. Being taller Seishirou could block the force of the water without getting it in his eyes, and Subaru could focus better on the task at hand. Beneath his hand.

Seishirou raised an eyebrow at him. Averting his gaze Subaru took a deep breath. Best to start at the shoulder, he decided, at least that was something less intimate. He tried not to give too much though to their position, and nervously began to rub the soap over Seishirou's skin where arm met torso in small, hesitant circles, painfully aware of Seishirou's eyes upon him. He moved slowly, partly to try and avoid the stab-wound, partly due to the saturated clothes that weighed him down. Once he had worked up enough of a lather he began to spread it down over Seishirou's blood-streaked arm like a painter applying a layer of thin white. All too quickly the white turned a shade of pale pink.

Blood shouldn't come off this easily, thought Subaru numbly. It should stain, it should scar just as the knowledge of it does, not be wiped away like this— A trail of soap slipped into Seishirou's wound eliciting a sharp indrawn breath; as if burnt, Subaru immediately jerked his hands away. "I'm sorry."

"It's all right." Like a great cat after a false alarm Seishirou relaxed, the sudden hyper-alertness sinking out of every part of him except his eyes which never moved from Subaru. "Go on."

Subaru looked sceptical. "Are you sure you don't want me to bandage your arm first?"

"It's fine. Keep going."

Obedient but unconvinced, Subaru reached out to touch Seishirou once more taking extra care around the stab wound. By now the water had saturated his clothes to the point that they were a real weight on his movements, and the wet denim of his jeans chafed uncomfortably against his thighs. Subaru endured it. He worked the soap methodically down Seishirou's lower arm, tracing the rise of muscle, rubbing the ball of his thumb into the crook of Seishirou's elbow to remove a more stubborn spot before following the long outline of bone down to the wrist erasing blood along the way. He cradled Seishirou's hand in his own as one by one, he took each of Seishirou's fingers together to clean the blood from beneath the fingernails. When that was done he began to make his way upwards once more attacking any stains he had missed. He had to pull a little to get to the underside of Seishirou's arm, and Seishirou allowed this manipulation, watching Subaru all the while. Subaru tried to ignore the scrutiny and instead concentrated on what he was doing, the water falling about his feet, the coolness of Seishirou's wet skin … he half-closed his eyes, remembering nights when he had lain awake tracing meaningless patterns on Seishirou's chest, and felt shivers beneath his palm that resonated with the tremor within himself as the soap's blood-tinged lather slipped and dripped through his fingers to the floor where it drained away into the dark.

The air was heavy. As if in a trance Subaru let his hands travel where they liked, closing his eyes as he followed the water's flow over muscle and bone moulding the object of his desire. Memory flickered: the first time Seishirou had come to his bed, how nervous he had been, too terrified and shy to even lay a hand on Seishirou and letting Seishirou do as he wished. Some of those inhibitions had been lost in the weeks that followed, but even then, Subaru had never imagined taking liberties with his lover's body to this extent. From the beginning their parts had always been so defined – mine is the first move, yours the reaction; I lead, you submit. Initiative and aggression, those belonged to Seishirou, and Subaru had been comfortable with that arrangement, preferred it, even. This role reversal was strangely surreal; he was touching, exploring Seishirou's body at will and feeling subtle responses like a blind man feeling silk, and even more astonishing was that Seishirou allowed him to do so. A satisfied shudder tingled through his fingers, almost effervescent and intriguing in a way that demanded deeper investigation, one he furthered by lingering over hip and thigh—

Muscles bunched beneath his palm. "You're hard," said Seishirou, seemingly offhand but there was a roughness in his words.

Subaru's eyes flew open. Felt all at once with excruciating sharpness the strain in the crotch of his wet jeans and immediately ducked his head to hide his face only to realise the development was far from one-sided. "So are you," he retorted, satisfaction giving him the impetus to look up and glare. Seishirou didn't reply to this, though the glint in his good eye as he very deliberately looked Subaru over was enough indication of where his thoughts were at the moment. It made Subaru flush, and briefly he was tempted to throw the challenge aside and just remove his clothes … he viciously squashed the temptation. He would not give in first; he had so little of his pride left and what few scraps were left to him he was desperate to keep.

Heaviness in his breathing. For a moment Subaru closed his eyes, steadying himself and focusing his thoughts in an attempt to set his arousal aside at least for now, an difficult feat even if he did feel horribly constrained in his water-drenched clothes. Maddeningly Seishirou didn't seem to be undergoing the same struggle; from the man's smile he seemed perfectly in control of himself, as usual, and Subaru felt his anger flare – he was painfully aware of the power Seishirou held over him and was determined to fight it this time on principle if nothing else, but it was completely unfair that he couldn't affect Seishirou in the same way … a sudden impulse struck him, a heady flutter of annoyance and daring, and before he could think about it he decided to act. He reached down and took hold of Seishirou's sex.

The reaction was immediate. Immediately Seishirou tensed, the rhythm of his breath hitching as his gaze flattened and locked onto Subaru's face. For his part Subaru felt his cheeks burn – part of him was panicking, aghast at such lewd presumption and fearful of any retaliation, but it was too late to back out now. Heart thudding in his ears Subaru began to stroke, keeping his eyes on Seishirou's with what he hoped was an expression of defiance, daring Seishirou to do something even as he bit his tongue. Water above them, water around them making Subaru's grip slide around taut flesh … his breathing grew rougher, echoing Seishirou's, the both of them hopelessly aroused yet he didn't dare look away from the other's rigid face as he worked, noting the way even the blind eye seemed to regain some flicker of life as Subaru's hand clenched in nervousness. Though really, the whole thing was a stupid situation because it was painfully obvious that each wanted the other yet out of sheer pride or stubbornness each refused to give in, however given the aching urgency of his need Subaru had the horrible feeling that inevitably he would be the first to blink—

A low growl was his only warning. Suddenly Subaru was shoved backwards against the wall of the shower cubicle, head slamming against the glass before his mouth was claimed in a harsh kiss. Momentarily stunned Subaru struggled a little, trying to regain his balance against on wet tiles, however once he had he reached up grip the back of Seishirou's neck – finally! – and kiss back with equal violence. There was heat all around as Seishirou's body pressed roughly against his, a knee pushing to rub between his thighs, and Subaru gave a hollow moan as he buried fingers in Seishirou's wet hair. His movements were somewhat hampered by the fact that his clothes were plastered to his skin – that had to be remedied, and soon. Apparently Seishirou agreed; breaking off the kiss, he slid his hands down Subaru's chest and moved against his stomach. "You missed dinner again, didn't you," said Seishirou critically.

"I … I wasn't hungry," Subaru replied vaguely. He could feel Seishirou's hands through the saturated cloth; they pressed into him as if he were clay before a potter about to craft a masterpiece.

"You're hungry now." Seishirou smirked, tugging Subaru's t-shirt up to get under it. "And don't you try to deny it."

Even Subaru had wanted to deny this he couldn't have as his t-shirt was sharply pulled over his head. This was achieved with some difficulty since the water-logged cloth insisted on clinging to him like a second skin, and for a moment Subaru was forced to stand limp like a captured and killed game animal as he was stripped. Eventually, though, the top was off and dropped unceremoniously in a corner with a soggy slap and the kiss could be resumed. At the same time there were hands working at the front of his jeans, and Subaru shuddered as Seishirou reached inside to grasp strongly him there – this, now, was familiar territory – greedily licking at the skin of Seishirou's throat in anticipation. Stiff denim, however, proved less assailable than the cotton t-shirt and Subaru heard Seishirou swear under his breath as he tried to peel the jeans downwards with little success. Falling water around them, about their heads, running into their kisses … impatiently Subaru half let go of his embrace to help Seishirou in the struggle against his clothing because sex aside, wet denim was damned uncomfortable. Between the two of them they managed to get everything down around Subaru's knees, and then it seemed that Seishirou's patience had run out. Once again Subaru found himself spun around and he gasped as he was shoved face-first against the wall of the shower by Seishirou's weight. Hastily he lifted his arms up and braced them against the glass, pulse quickening even more as he awaited what he knew would be next. That was all the preparation he got before Seishirou pushed into him.

Damp breath on the back of his neck. Squeezing his eyes shut against the initial pain Subaru expelled a taut sigh, bending with Seishirou's drive and shuddering as he was roughly filled. An arm bent around to possessively circle his chest, and then a second, harder push that made Subaru buck and whimper. His saturated jeans were a real weight about his knees but he was barely aware of it as quickly a rhythm was established, his body forced to move according to the demands of the other's thrust and need, demands he was desperate to meet. Dizzily Subaru rested his forehead against his right arm, feeling and revelling in the way Seishirou moved within him, the sound of harsh breathing in his ear … the arm around his chest shifted, reaching down to take hold of his own arousal and stroke it with palpable urgency calling up more of those bone-deep shudders. Unconsciously he moaned, fingers scrabbling uselessly against smooth glass, and in response he felt Seishirou's left arm reach up to cover his hand in his, a tangential warmth compared to the kisses being pressed against the nape of his neck but oh so welcome … they were moving faster now, water making their bodies slick, Seishirou plunging even deeper even as his hand between Subaru's legs clenched, Subaru's shallow panting misting against the glass as the excruciating pleasure built … suddenly he felt Seishirou stiffen, breath hitching sharply, and then Subaru could only shiver with the warmth spreading through his body as he felt the man come inside him, but there was still his own need to face and although Seishirou had relaxed he was still mercilessly stroking Subaru commanding his release—

"You—"

—it was too much to hold, too much to keep silent and with a fractured cry Subaru arched his head back over Seishirou's shoulder, violently jerking once more into Seishirou's hand and trembling as it ended, brilliant, resonant – and all too soon.

Water dripped down his skin. Still braced against the shower's glass Subaru opened his eyes, chest slowly heaving against Seishirou's arm as he regained his breath only to catch it briefly again in his throat as Seishirou pulled away from him. The withdrawal hurt somewhat, more than it usually did, but it was countered by hands around his waist sliding to ease his jeans down to his ankles. Obediently Subaru stepped out of them, listening to the sloshing sound as Seishirou pushed the clothes into a corner (remember, Subaru told himself, laundry) and then he was being gently but insistently drawn back under the shower's spray. After running for so long the water was lukewarm at best, and Subaru tiredly rested his head against Seishirou's shoulder as the water ran over them … once again he was being touched, soap-filled hands running over his body, returning the favour Subaru had performed earlier. The humid air smelt of iron; there was blood running down Seishirou's right arm again. "You need to bandage that," Subaru said softly.

"I know." Strong hands trailed down his spine. "You already told me."

Subaru closed his eyes. Without resisting he let Seishirou continue washing him down more intimate than sensual, white lather flowing away with the water until eventually there was nothing left – nothing, that is, except the odd drops of crimson at their feet.

The water stopped. Seishirou had switched it off. Drowsily Subaru watched as he slid the shower door open with a metallic clack, and then the man was exiting the shower entirely. Subaru followed him; he felt strangely detached, though he still automatically murmured thanks as Seishirou handed him his bathrobe. He put it on slowly, watching as Seishirou wrapped the spare towel about his waist before heading over to the medicine kit Subaru had dropped. The kit's contents were strewn everywhere but the antiseptic wipes and roll of bandages were easy enough to retrieve, and with an expertise that recalled to Subaru's mind the vet he had first fallen in love with the assassin wiped the blood from his wounded arm and wrapped it. Cutting and tying off the bandage, however, proved tricky to do one-handed, especially when the scissors were lying against the wall not far from Subaru's feet. Subaru picked them up and went to help.

"Here, let me." Gently he took the roll from Seishirou and snipped it off, letting it fall to the floor again as he tied off the ends of the bandage. He took care not to make it too tight. "Done."

"Thank you." Briefly Seishirou flashed a smile at him before experimentally flexing his arm. "Feels good; the wound should heal over in a couple of weeks. I'll have to avoid exerting and re-opening it, though."

Subaru did not smile. Now that it was quieter he could hear that outside the night was silent; the rain had stopped. "You should go now," he said quietly.

There was a short pause. "I beg your pardon?"

"The storm has finished; it's not raining anymore. You can leave."

An unreadable look moved over Seishirou's now unsmiling face. "After what just happened—"

"What happened, Seishirou-san, is that you kissed me first. That means I win, and you said that if I got through this with my dignity you'd leave. What's more, you said you'd leave without protest."

There was a long silence, one during which Seishirou stared down at him with the closest approximation of disbelief that Subaru had ever seen on the Sakurazukamori's face. In return Subaru met it as best he could, green eyes tense but resolute though inwardly he couldn't help but feel afraid of how Seishirou was going to respond … one by one seconds ticked away as they faced each other, increasing Subaru's anxiety – and then Seishirou smiled. "I did say that, didn't I," he said. Suddenly he chuckled under his breath. "Well, no point arguing, then."

Subaru blinked in startlement as Seishirou walked away to retrieve his pants. "You mean you're going?" he asked disbelievingly.

"I know when I've outstayed my welcome." The black pants went on, the white towel went on the bathroom floor. "Though, really, given that you obviously enjoyed what you had of my presence you'll forgive me for having thought otherwise."

Subaru felt his face heat. "It's the principle of the matter," he retorted defensively.

"I know, however considering you and I both know that I'll eventually come again – for the rest of my clothes if nothing else – I'd say the principle doesn't really have a point. But I suppose whatever makes you feel better." These words made Subaru glare, but before he could say anything Seishirou strode over and caught him in a swift, punishing kiss that ended too quickly for Subaru to properly react. "I expect my shirt cleaned for the next time I visit, all right?" Seishirou whispered into his ear.

Angered, Subaru turned away and did not reply as he was let go. Still, however, he couldn't help but watch as Seishirou unhooked his suit jacket and trench-coat from the back of the bathroom door and put them on, buttoning the coat up to the collar as he left – the man was surely tired and he faced a cold trip home in damp clothes, but if this irritated Seishirou any he wasn't showing it. Certainly Subaru wasn't going to let on how much he himself was starting to feel guilty – for him, victories in Seishirou's games were few and very far between, and petty as this one was it was his and he was going to see it through. Like a shadow he followed Seishirou out of the bathroom back to the dimly lit living room; already Seishirou had put his shoes on and was sliding the balcony door open letting in the wind. Not once did Seishirou look back as he prepared to leave – and then, just before he disappeared, Subaru's resolution faltered.

"Seishirou-san."

A pause. Seishirou was half-turned towards him. Subaru nervously cleared his throat. "Next time … use the front door, okay?"

A small smile. Then, without further ado, Seishirou stepped outside and disappeared into the night as swiftly as he had come, leaving Subaru with only his pride for comfort as he waited for tomorrow.

Subaru found his pride cold. There wasn't anyone around to admit this to.

 

+ owari +